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I HAD THE GOOD FORTUNE RECENTLY to spend several days in Phoenix as part of the 45th Annual Friends of Erma Bombeck Authors Luncheon. It has become a leading book destination because more than 1000 people pack into a ballroom to hear authors tell the stories behind their books, buy lots of copies, and support the National Kidney Foundation of Arizona. The event was named for humorist Erma Bombeck, bestselling disgruntled suburban housewife, Phoenix resident, regular on Good Morning America, columnist for 900 newspapers, and in many ways, a feminist. Her wry sense of humor was a refreshing tonic to millions as she meandered through life changing diapers, baking meatloaf, attending teacher meetings, and dishing on it one joke at a time. But Erma’s life was plagued by polycystic kidney disease. A kidney transplant that didn’t take eventually led to her death in 1996. It was her dream to raise money for those who suffered like her in Arizona. ‘’My mom said, ‘I don’t really want to go to another fashion show for women. I can get my friends, and they can sell their books, and we can make money,’ ‘’ according to her daughter Betsy. The first friends she invited to attend the event were Marlo Thomas, Phil Donahue, and Stephen King.
At the Phoenix book event, Betsy Bombeck was standing in line to get her copy of my cookbook signed, and because the table where I was sitting was up on a podium, Betsy and I were looking eye to eye. I asked Betsy about layered salad. If you Google Erma Bombeck and ‘’favorite recipe,’’ it’s what pops up. ‘’Yes,’’ she said. ‘’My mom made it. And also Cherry Surprise.’’ Betsy discreetly handed me her contact info as if we were trading secrets. I called her this past week. ‘’I don’t think we ever saved that recipe,’’ laughed Betsy on the phone, referring to Cherry Surprise. ‘’It was Thanksgiving dinner and we always had extra people at the table, and mom said she’s making Cherry Surprise. It was this molded salad but when she took the mold off, it ran all over the place. ‘Eat it,’ my mom said. ‘It will taste better than it looks.’ ‘’ Layered salad, on the other hand, was everyone’s go-to back in the ‘70s. It made a grand appearance at potlucks and holidays and pretty much everything in between. And I rationalized that it made perfect sense for Erma to make a layered salad, stick it in the fridge, and serve it later.
Erma Louise Fiste was born into a working class family in Dayton, Ohio, in 1927. Her father died when she was nine, and she and her mother, who was also named Erma, moved in with her grandmother. Betsy said her mom was shy, ‘’a loner,’’ who loved books and started writing a humor column for her high school newspaper. She worked her way through college, the University of Dayton, by writing a newsletter for a local department store, and then she became a reporter for the Dayton Journal-Herald and birthed a column called ‘’Operation Dustrag,’’ a funny take on homemaking. Four years after she married her husband Bill Bombeck in 1949, they adopted Betsy. Two years later, she was pregnant with a son Andrew (Andy), and they moved to the suburbs—Centerville, Ohio. They would have another son, Matthew (Matt), born in 1958. She had plenty to write about. A second column, ‘’At Wit’s End,’’ was syndicated by Newsday and appeared in newspapers nationwide.
My mother was crazy about Erma, and I believe Erma resonated with millions of women like my mom who knew they weren’t perfect and didn’t want to be. It was decades before Martha Stewart would glue-gun pinecones to a door wreath. These women had made it through the World War II years, and they were just trying to survive home life. What would Erma do today if she were still alive? I wondered. What would she say?Erma was appointed to the President's National Advisory Committee for Women in 1978 for the final implementation of the Equal Rights Amendment. She traveled to almost every state where the battle for the ERA was being waged. She believed that no matter if you worked outside the home or as a homemaker, what you give to society should be considered equal. But the ERA ultimately failed. Erma would lament, according to Lynn Hutner Colwell, author of Erma Bombeck: Writer and Humorist: ‘’We've got a generation now who were born with semi-equality. They don't know how it was before, so they think, this isn't too bad. We're working. We have our attaché cases and our three piece suits…We had a torch to pass, and they are just sitting there. They don't realize it can be taken away.’’
Betsy said her mother would ‘’have some difficulty with what’s going on today.’’‘’She wouldn’t understand the divide in this country. She was able to meet with people from both sides…And she would have said to look for commonalities because we all have kids, we all are on deadlines or in carpools, and we all can have kindness and still have different views. ‘’She used to always tell us don’t sweat the small stuff. If you cut your toes off with that lawnmower don’t come running to me. If you cross your eyes, they will freeze.’’ Anybody can bring you to tears, said Erma. ‘’It is 20 times as easy—make that 50–to make people cry rather than laugh.’’ The power of humor: 10 Erma quotes to get us through post-election and the holidays
What are your favorite Erma quotes?
What was it like having Erma as your mom‘’It was different growing up, there were always film people at our house, but first of all, she was a mom. And she saw the world in such a different way than other people did,’’ Betsy said. ‘’She saw the humor in life. She was oddly sentimental. You had to be funny to survive in our family! ‘’My first cookbook from my mom was the Betty Crocker cookie cookbook for kids and we baked every recipe in there.’’ One time Betsy and a friend were baking the lace cookies but they overcooked them and the cookies stuck to the pan. Years later, Betsy finds her mom kept the burnt pan and she asked her why. ‘’She said, ‘it reminded me of you girls.’ ‘’ After I returned from Phoenix, I drove to Athens, Tennessee for a book signing at Greek’s Bearing Gifts. I was talking with my friend and shop owner Patti Greek about Erma Bombeck and she pointed to the wall by the cash register. There was a framed Erma passage—a gift from her dad who had been a big fan. She recalled how he laughed his way through life, too. Erma, to me, was a champion. She said things that women of her time thought about but dared not speak. I hope this letter leaves you a little happier than when you started… - xo, Anne P.S. Here’s a great YouTube video of Erma.
Book Tour NewsA big request: If you have bought my book (via Amazon or Barnes & Noble) and are able to write a review, please do so. Thank you! After this newsletter is published, I am heading to Kentucky. I’ll be in conversation with author and baker Stella Parks in Lexington on Wednesday 11/13 at 7 pm at Joseph-Beth Booksellers. So excited to meet Stella! And the next night, I will be speaking with a fellow Substackian, Scott Hines, in Louisville. See you at 7 pm at Carmichael’s Books on Frankfort Highway. This weekend, I will be in Austin at the Texas Book Festival, appearing in the Central Market Cooking Tent Sunday at 11:30 am with signing afterwards. Hope to meet you!
Hello Jacksonville! I cannot wait to be in Jax to talk with your best bakers about baking in the South. Here is the link to sign up for this fabulous event sponsored by Edible Northeast Florida. Space is limited. Check out my complete tour schedule here. Remember that Nov. 15 is National Bundt Day, so pull out your favorite pan and bake! For Paid Subscribers, I’ll be sharing details soon of a Paid Subscriber Zoom Holiday Party. Woohoo! There will be prizes and guest appearances. And most of all, there will be all of YOU! I so appreciate your paying a bit to allow me to keep doing what I love, writing this newsletter and testing these recipes SO THEY WORK. We’ve grown into a very nice community. If you’re a free reader and you feel you can swing it, I’d love for you to become a paid subscriber, too.
THE RECIPE: Erma Bombeck’s Layered Salad (Revisited)Layered salad will never go out of style. It’s still the perfect recipe to tote to potlucks and chili parties. And it can be prepped ahead and stored in the fridge. I’ve updated Erma’s recipe, and my recipe below can further be updated to suit your tastes. It’s just so beautiful with the layers. Be sure to dig deeply when you scoop it onto plates. Makes 8 servings
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